Ted Williams: Finding His Self-Defined Success

If you don't know who this man is by now, you either don't live in the U.S. (which a surprising number of you reading my blog don't), or you've been away from any form of media over the last week.

It was just a 7-8 days ago this man burst upon the scene in a YouTube Video that quickly went viral. This one-time radio personality turned small-time crook, druggie, and alcoholic turned homeless man begging on the roadway is going through yet another transformation. Thanks to the local cameraman and the mystic tides of the world wide web, he's now he's being offered jobs and homes from companies including Kraft Macaroni & Cheese, the Cleveland Cavaliers, and NFL Films.





He's appeared on numerous news programs, and has reportedly received 500 job offers. We love our underdogs, and our redemption stories, don't we? Just look at the resuscitation of Michael Vick's career with Philadelphia in the NFL this year. Or the hopeful looks aimed towards Tiger Woods as the 2011 PGA Season begins.

Many people have said he's "lucky". Others wonder why they can't get a break, when they've never broken the law or had the problems Mr. Williams has battled with. Others just scoff, believing this is just another internet fad that will burn itself our, a la Pants on the Ground.

The way I see it - this man is a Champion of Choice. At least the Choice he made to make the sign espousing his God-given talents, and find a busy intersection to beg at, and be willing to be filmed. His Choices before that may be suspect, but how many of us have never made a suspect choice? Or an outright BAD Choice?

The key is that he changed the Choices he was making in an attempt NOT just to survive from day to day, but to draw attention to his talent, which he knew could lead to his Self-Defined Success. What I doubt he realized was that his end-result would be his goal multiplied by such a large degree.

It's not over for Mr. Williams. He has many Choices ahead of him, including Choices that, if poorly made, could take him back to his old version of Self-Defined Success - drugs and alcohol. For his sake, I hope he's figured it out after all these years.

What about us? What can we do? What small Choice can we make that God, or You Tube, can multiply by an nth degree? Without a doubt, to achieve your success you must choose to do so. Even 'The Voice' would still be a voice in a cardboard box without making a Choice to step towards his resuscitated Self-Defined Success.

Little Toy Soldiers

New Year's morning I was pumped and ready to go. Time to hop on the computer and blog and design websites and make things happen for the new year.

First course of action for me was breakfast - all protein to get me a headstart on my return to Atkins in my quest to reach 200 lbs by Jan. 31, and qualify for a new prosthetic leg. 25 lbs to lose in 31 days - I can make it, if I focus. Headed upstairs, and my dear wife was already breaking the eggs into the skillet.

Quickly, I shifted gears into another goal for the year, being a better husband. I zoomed past the kitchen into the laundry room and pushed a load through. To give you some idea of how much I need to be a better husband in this particular area, I had to ask her how to operate the new washer we bought last year (ouch!).

Breakfast was great, and I took the dry clothes out to the living room to fold, readying myself for the dash down to my office to work. Just as I reached the bottom of the pile, my five-year-old son, Riker, started setting up his toy soldiers in the entry way, just as I used to do. He'd gotten his first set for Christmas, and was doing exactly what I described to him Christmas Day that I did years ago.

Conflicting orders. Do I rush downstairs, knowing he'll be fine, and hadn't asked me to join him? Or do I take the time with him to play? It may make for a syrupy post, but you're right if you assumed I got down on the floor with him. We set up opposing forces, then rolled a plastic ball towards each others men, methodically taking down the other's armada. He beat me with one last man standing.

Conflicting orders, by nature, create conflict. Did I do the right thing? It's easy to say yes, right? But what if that had led me to playing the rest of the day with the other kids? What if I let it derail my entire day?

Could an argument be made that I should have gone down, written my blog, then come back up? Certainly - the old adage "Do what you have to do so you can do what you want to do" is some of the oldest wisdom in the book.

But we are not Little Toy Soldiers, with our feet frozen in a singular stance. We have the ability to make our choices based on what we feel makes us successful, not what the world determines makes us successful. Even playing with Riker - I 'lost' the battle - but I won the War - the war with myself as to what I should do in the instant of conflicting orders. And I still came downstairs to work, as well.

It doesn't always happen that way - but it will happen more often when we stop letting other decide our outcomes for us - and take responsibility for each choice, and responsibility for creating our Self-Defined Success.

Trust.

photo by Tela Chhe

Learning to walk is never easy. As infants, we start with blind trust as we imitate those older than us and attempt to get on our feet. With the first fall, we begin learning NOT to trust.

Falling hurts. Don't trust the concrete. Don't trust the end table corner. Don't trust whatever it is I just tripped on, leaving my face a half inch deep in blue shag carpet.

Mommy - I can trust Mommy. She'll catch me. If she's not making dinner, cleaning the table, or running that loud machine in the living room that seems intent on chasing me all over the house.

Eventually, we learn to trust ourselves, our own strength and balance, and walking becomes second nature.

For me, I had to learn to walk twice. Once the regular way, then, for the second time, 38 years later. When my left ankle ceased to operate without pain, I took the upgrade option, allowing doctors to lop off my left leg about five inches below my left knee. This meant 6 weeks in bed, followed by the fitting of a prosthetic leg.

There are a lot of factors involved with learning to walk after a procedure like this. For me, I was relatively lucky. No catastrophic injury, so my remaining leg was healthy, the stump smooth and uniform. I was healthy, if a bit overweight, and I had some incentive - I was due to compete in the 2006 World Championship of Public Speaking 8 weeks after being given my first new leg. I wanted to walk across that stage if at all possible - and walk without worry.

Just as I did as a one-year-old, I went through a testing process, learning to trust all over again. To trust that my leg wouldn't hurt when I walked. That I was putting the new leg on correctly. That it wouldn't fall off, buckle under my weight, or slip out from under me. I had to take a leap of faith - trust in something that I couldn't verify ahead of time, since I couldn't feel where my new foot was. I spent many days falling forward, falling backward, totally focused on the leg, instead of walking.

It wasn't until I chose to trust the prosthetic that I began to walk as I had before. To focus on the goal and trust I had the process in place to get me there.

It's easy to spend life looking for better and better processes. Faster, more reliable technology. The next big thing. The silver bullet, sure-fire system to fame and fortune. Is it easier to focus on the method instead of the goal? Do we feel we have control over methods, but not the results?

Certainly, finding a good system/process/prosthetic is important. But there comes a point when we need to Trust in the process we've given ourselves, instead of waiting for something better. To focus on where we're going more than how we're getting there. You rarely get where you're wanting to go by focusing on your toes, synthetic or otherwise.

Trust is a good thing - and remember - after you learned to walk - you learned to RUN.