Another Month Gone By - Almost

I'm now fully invested in my new career, having gone through the first six weeks with fair success and a bit of a promotion/vote of confidence from my employer.

What has gone by the wayside in this time, despite my intentions, has been this blog, Speak & Deliver, my wife's book, my diet, my involvement in Toastmasters, my participation with my mastermind group, and my connection with my friends via blog, Facebook, & Twitter.

That's a major change, and not one I like. While I was busy trekking around the Midwest, I found myself exhausted when I wasn't in the moments of adrenaline, setting up, speaking, tearing down and doing it all over again the next day. From Jan 29 to Feb 17 I gave 18 presentations in 7 states, stayed in 8 hotels, drove 4 rental cars and took 7 planes on four itineraries.

Not Guinness Book material, perhaps, but certainly a shock to my system. In addition to all of that, I was dealing with adjusting to a new job, new procedures, new bosses, all while trying to be a long-distance husband and father.

Whew - I get tired just writing about it.

So now I'm home - working from home, still adjusting to the new job, planning travels for March and April, figuring out how I'm going to plan my Fall speaking schedule (around 75 presentations in 20 cities over a three and a half month period), and still wanting the be the blogger, writer, speaking coach that defines who I really am.

While this job is great, and is definitely going to help my bigger dreams in the long run, I don't want it to ever define who I am, beyond someone who puts forth full effort into everything he does.

Which begs the question - can I put full effort into all facets of my life with the addition of this job, or do I need to let some things go? Do I lessen my involvement in my blogs? I already have, I guess - but really I've just been gone.

Decisions need to be made - how much time do I have to devote to being who I really am?

Weekend Update #1

The first weekend of the year is packed with activity here at the Hopkins household.

I've been working to memorize a script for an audition tape as part of one of my 'secret choices' for 2010, a tape that must be made today and delivered tomorrow. A lot more effort than I expected - its been awhile since I memorized anything word for word. A lot is potentially at stake by how well I pull this off, and the results of this choice may be known as early as this week.

I'm facing one physical issue today, and that seems to be a twisted ankle, or simply a swelled right foot. I can walk somewhat, but I'm in a lot of pain. I'm concerned about the impact this will have on the video, but I am medicating as much as possible. If push comes to shove, I may head to the ER to see if I can get something magic to allow me to perform for an hour or so standing up.

Kristi, as she's been saying over at her blog "Thriving with Neurofibromatosis", is spending the week out East for surgery at NIH. We braved the 4 am traffic to get her to the airport this morning, leaving me home for 7 days with 6 kids. The week ahead should prove adventurous!

Today is also my oldest daughter's birthday - she's now 14! She's bummed her mom is gone, and her party is delayed a few weeks, but I'm still thinking up ways to make the day special for her.

My choices today revolve around getting the script memorized, the video completed, and keeping my kids alive. Perhaps I can get some football watching in as well, but that will have to take a low priority :)

Make 2010 the Start of a Decade of Directed, Determined Choice

10 years ago today, I woke up to a world that hadn't been destroyed by Y2K, a still-fledgling marriage (less than a month old), 2 young children, and a welcome day off from working as a retail ad salesman for the Salt Lake Tribune/Deseret News. I was in Toastmasters, but didn't have any designs at that point of becoming a speaker or coach - I hadn't even competed in a contest yet.

This morning, I woke up to a world that hasn't been destroyed by terrorism, despite our worst fears, a stronger-than-ever marriage (yes, to the same woman), 6 kids, and no days off from pursuing my passions of being a speaker and coach!

The 2000's
The last 10 years have been dominated by five activities: growing my family, growing myself, physical challenges, searching for focused career goals, and competing for the World Championship of Public Speaking - with mixed results.

My family has certainly grown, in size and maturity. I married not just a wife, but her two kids, and we've added 4 more. Watching them grow and mature, seeing how they take cues from me and Kristi, it's an amazing process to nurture an individual to model behavior and determine their own.

Growing myself had never been that big a priority. I'd been sent to a seminar that featured some professional speakers, including Zig Ziglar, Peter Lowe, Mary Lou Retton, General Schwartzkopf and a couple others in the 90's, and I was vaguely aware that for a few thousand dollars I could buy tapes from a guy with big teeth named Tony that would help me Awaken The Giant Within. But it wasn't until 2001 that I actually listened to Tom Hopkins sales training (loaned to me by someone who asked if I was related to Tom). I started reading Robbins, Tracy, Covey, getting deeper and deeper into discovering the world of self-development, and the role speaking played in it. This part of my life would have a significant aspect on my career choices the rest of the decade.

My physical challenge put me into position to make a choice I never imagined having to make - trading the substandard manufacturer version of my lower left leg in for a Super Deluxe Robot Leg. Waking up in January of 2006 without being able to take a step on my long-deteriorating ankle led to a series of appointments which led to a voluntary amputation. I had other options, they just weren't good ones, in my eyes. Little did I know at the time this was the genesis of what would later become my quest to create the Champions of Choice.

My career goals of being a speaker and coach didn't become clear until 2005, but the vehicle by which I work to reach them would change often, and continues to remain in flux even now. The experiences I've had selling newspaper and magazine ads, working as a media buyer, coaching speakers, speaking to audiences on everything from competition to leadership to goal setting to speaking, and even co-writing three books have given me more experience than many would expect over a ten year period. Working for myself has been my choice the last few years, but there are opportunities for me to take my skills to the workplace, which 2010 may see me do.

I never did win the World Championship of Public Speaking, despite competing 9 out of 10 years, finishing in the Top 100 worldwide 6 out of 8 years, the Top 20 five times, and actually making it to the final competition in both 2006 and 2008, finishing 3rd in '06 (competing even while recovering from the amputation). I learned a tremendous amount from my experiences. I coached my first speaking client in 2004, helping a nervous father give a 15 minute toast at his daughter's wedding, which was taking place in a castle in Austria. I gained skill and confidence as a speaker, and realized how much I enjoyed it, eventually finding my way to paid speaking engagements in 2005, even before I made it to the finals.

The Genesis of the Champions of Choice
It took me another 3 years to realize that everything I wanted to tell people boiled down to their willingness  to choose to do them - and that if I didn't talk to people about reclaiming their power of choice, everything else could easily end up as so much blather. The Champion of Choice was born, and in its first 9 months suffered from all the pangs of babyhood as I realized I was not living up to my own standards. If you've been reading, you've witnessed the unevenness of it all!

It takes more than believing in the Power of Choice. It takes consistent Choices of Action as they relate to your Choice of Desired Results. It takes the Choice of Personal Responsibility combined with the Choice of Personal Forgiveness, followed quickly by the Choice of Persistence.

The Challenge of 2010
This year, I am choosing to take action every day to develop into a stronger Champion. I want to help as many people as possible this year Choose to take the Actions necessary to take their lives to a higher, more successful level than ever before. By the end of this year, I want 2010 success stories from 2010 different Champions of Choice. Even though I've heard from many of you over the last few months who've changed jobs, lost weight, and set new goals, 2010 sets the higher than ever.

No matter where my choices bring me (and I've got some surprise choices in the works this year), I will be leading this charge all year long. I will be blogging every day, even if its just a few lines. I will be adding features, contests, and content on a regular basis. My first choice is to continue to be open and honest about my victories and defeats, and encourage you to do the same. I've battled between the marketing angle of looking perfect vs. being real. I've been told by experts that people only want to follow those that have already reached the promised land, and I've been told by experts that people want to follow those they can identify with. In light of that, I'll simply choose to be the latter as I journey towards the former. And when I reach the promised land, you'll have taken the journey with me.

The last ten years, at least for me, have been a Decade of Education & Discovery - often by accident. The next ten will be the Decade of Directed, Determined Choice. Follow the blog, leave a comment, join the NING site - stake your Choice for all to see!

Three...Two...One...2010!

A bit less than 3 days left in the year, and the decade, for that matter. What choices could you make in the next three days that will change your life? Are you waiting for January 1st to plan? If so, you're cheating yourself out of 48-60 hours of time that could put you that much farther ahead come the New Year. Besides, who's going to sit around making choices when they could be watching Dick Clark for what could be his last year on Earth? (and we've been saying that for how long?)


I'm busy preparing the 2010 launch of Champions of Choice - a new look for the Challenge and all the Champions who've been a part of it to this point. This includes a re-invigorated approach to the NING site, a re-boot of the Newsletter, and a re-boot of the Facebook Fan Page - and that's just the beginning! More details to come.

How has the Champion of Choice Challenge helped you this year? How would you like to see it improve? Leave your comments, or email me at Rich@richhopkins.com - I want to hear from you. The good, the bad the ugly, about you, and about me.

In the meantime - get busy gettin' ready - the time to jump on 2010 is now!

Career Suicide: 5 Steps to Failure

An Article I wrote 4 years ago, that seems as pertinent now as it did then.

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Your career can affect every area of happiness in your life, from your recreational options to your family-life, from your financial stability to your personal fulfillment. Yet so many of us fall into common traps that sabotage our careers and endanger our futures. Don’t let yourself fall prey to any of the self-destructive choices below:

1. Ignoring your talents
2. Living beyond your means
3. Torching the trellises
4. Not planning ahead
5a. Choosing a profession you don't believe in
5b. Choosing a profession you hate

1. Ignoring your talents. So what if everyone told you being an engineer would make you more money than drawing comic books? We get one life – do you want to spend it miserable and wealthy, or fulfilled and, well, maybe still wealthy? Last I checked, Todd McFarlane, the artist who rejuvenated Spider-Man and created Spawn, is worth several million dollars. Your talents exist for a reason – discover where they can take you.

2. Living beyond your means. No matter what you do, if you aren’t making enough money to cover your lifestyle, you will be unhappy, and ultimately unproductive and hazardous to your career. Either find a job that makes more money, or learn to live on what you currently make. When we learn to live a lifestyle that is in line with what we earn, we understand the true value of our efforts.

3. Torching the trellises. More commonly known as burning bridges, leaving a past employer or co-workers with a bad taste in their mouths will haunt you. If your career path doesn’t change, you’ll probably work with or for some of these people again. Even if you make a career shift or move out of state, anyone of them can turn into future clients, members of your church, or even next-door neighbors. Stay professional through every job transition, and you can preserve a wide base of support for the future.

4. Not planning ahead. Technology advancements, market conditions, layoffs – the workplace is more unstable today than at any time in the last 75 years. Stay abreast of changes in your industry. Educate yourself by keeping up with trade magazines, software updates, and company business. Be ready to land on your feet if the firmament under you falls away without warning.

5a. Choosing a cause or employer you don’t believe in. If you do not value the work you do, or the company for which you work, get out! You may be doing what you love, but if you are doing it without a strong belief behind it, it will ultimately undermine any short-term success you experience. Great newspaper salespeople may switch to billboards to make a higher income, but not be able to sell it as well if their belief in the product is too low. Take inventory of your values. Great defense attorneys don’t always make great prosecutors.

5b. Choosing a profession you hate. Sounds rather self-evident, but it happens continually. How many times a day do we deal with someone at a store, over the phone, or in our own offices who clearly hates their job? Don’t let yourself be swayed by prestige, promotion, or money if the job you will take is one you’ve sworn you’d never do, or spent much of your life de-valuing. The day will come when you look in the mirror and wonder who you’ve become.

Career failures lead to financial hardship, family strife, and depression, yet we often make knee-jerk decisions when exiting and entering the workforce. Keep these guidelines in mind next time you shift career paths: Examine your career decisions for at least 24 hours before accepting a position – if it’s the right job, it’ll still be there tomorrow.

Stay true to yourself by finding an accountability partner who can objectively discuss your career path, as opposed to a close friend or family member who may have too large a stake in your affairs. Finally, remember that you are in charge of your career, not the other way around – it exists to enable you to live the rest of your life, not to destroy it.

Who Do You Follow, And Who Follows You?

I've been listening to a lot of speakers talk about leadership lately.

They talk about Vision and Goals, Trust and Authenticity, Experience and Follow-through, and many more wonderful qualities we must cultivate to become leaders, and that we look for in those we follow. Leadership is a buzzworthy topic in any age, and moreso as we seem to see a vacuum in leadership in every sector.

We are so desperate for leadership, we look for it where it doesn't always exist, whether in the promise of a new President, the powerful persuasion of a motivational guru, or the pristine image of a mega-star golfer.

What do YOU look for in a leader? Do you want them to take you somewhere, or show you where you can go? Do you want them to have all the answers, or help you find them for yourself?

Too much faith in anyone is bound to fail us in the end. That's why I'm working to build a world full of Champions of Choice. Champions lead themselves, by both choosing who to follow, and making choices worth following. Who are you going to follow, and who will follow your lead?

Scrooge Always Has A Choice

I both love and hate Christmas.

On one hand, I love everything about Christmas, from the music to the shopping excess to Santa Claus - and that's just the secular aspect. Despite being well aware of Christmas' origins, I love the religious aspects of the holiday. I read the story of Christ's birth AND Twas the Night Before Christmas on Christmas Eve. I love stockings and anticipation that keeps kids from sleeping until 2 am just to get up at 5 am to jump on Mom and Dad's bed. I love chocolate santa's, Brach's Christmas candies, and those assorted nuts at the bottom of the stockings.

And I have some great memories of Christmas and Grandpa Bob and Grandma Lula Hopkins house, even though they had a (gasp) FAKE tree! Grandma did up Christmas just like Thanksgiving, but added homemade chocolate candy and chocolate fudge to the mix. There'd be candy bowls full all over the house. How much could I eat out of each one before people started to notice?

But Christmas also stresses me out beyond belief. To the point my wife thinks that I actually HATE Christmas. She's right. I get incredibly tense thinking about whether or not everyone will be happy with what they get (that costs HOW MUCH? then multiply by six...who's going to think they're ripped off? why aren't I a millionaire yet?). I hate dealing with 'arrangements' - where are we going when and to what? Externally, I'm always pretending not to worry, and that we should be happy even if we have a Christmas like they had on Little House on the Prairie when Laura only got a small doll, a tin cup, and a penny. This does not instill confidence in my wife. But internally I'm fretting not living up to the perfection I really want Christmas to be.

Beyond those conscious, somewhat logical irritations, I also have a visceral response to the season that puts me on edge, tensing me with increasing power the closer we get to the 25th, until I'm so stressed and tired that Christmas morning its all I can do to smile and pretend to enjoy watching the wrapping paper fly through the air.

If I was talking with Oprah, I'd probably talk about my parent's divorce and all the Christmases that followed without Dad. I might open up about the many relationships, even an engagement that crumbled over the Christmas holidays. If I was talking with Dave Ramsey, he might suggest I adjust my expectations to my income - though if I were talking to Tony Robbins, he'd tell me to adjust my income to my expectations.
Maybe its just knowing the kids are home for 2 weeks and my productivity is doomed to dive-bomb dramatically.

In the end, all of these excuses for me to be an annually grouchy humbugger are not worthy of the Champions of Choice. The Past is Past, the Present (and Presents) is just fine, and the Future is ours to decide. I never chose to feel negative during the holidays. I didn't think I could control it, as deep-seeded as the emotions were. That's the key - I didn't think I had a choice. Of course, I do. Whether it's Christmas, Fourth of July, or Bastille Day, how we feel, and the actions reflecting those feelings, are completely within our control.

This year, I'm choosing to enjoy every second of Christmas, even if it kills me. I'm certain the kids will be happy with what they're getting - we've been blessed beyond belief this year. The decorations are up and the music is blasting (Harry Connick Jr., at the moment). We're handling the event and the food here this year, eliminating any concerns about who sees who for how long. The real test will come if anything goes awry, I suppose.

I have loved and hated Christmas, know it or not, by choice. Time to choose just love. Which is, after all, what this season should be about in the first place. Welcome home kids - let's have a great Christmas break....now go clean your rooms!